New Year Resolution

2006 is coming in a few days and bye-bye to 2005. 1 year almost gone. Again earth completes his circle to the sun. Every year most of the people around the world again will declare New Year resolution. But FYI, me all this while was excluded. I was never made any resolution. People always ask me, “What is your new year resolution? Do you plan anything?” I just simply answer them, just to continue last year resolution that was yet to achieve.

Why do I have no resolution?
1- First because my previous naïve days, I am not really understands why people need to have a resolution. For me, if you want to achieve something, you do not have to wait until 1 January every year. You can have it at any time that you want and do get to the target.

2- Secondly, I still don’t know what is actually that I want to achieve in my life. For now, I just run my routine life day by day. With an effort, doa, rezeki and also luck, as long as I have a place to stay, food to eat and happy family and happy life is enough for me.

But today,
My perceptions change. I’m blaming on my hormones and maturities for this change. As I learn on what life is. On how difficult for us to get our dream life or maintain it, 2005 teach me its not as easy as we think during childhood days. After been thru life in 2005 I know that Cinderella story is not applied to every human in the world. It’s not that simple as I think.

As I’m getting older on every second, today I realize that my future path was so unclear. I still don’t know what actually that I want. I know that I always dreams of having happy family, stable economically, to have Hakuna Matata life, able to get my dream car, house, cloth or expensive lingerie easily. I think that’s would apply to everybody.

My value experience at Mecca, has teach me a thousand things. A part of getting chance to perform my Ibadah, I have a golden opportunity to see a thousand of face from multiple culture, language, lifestyle – poor or rich, different level of education and many more… I can tell you, when you see these people, you are going to start to think, where are they come from, what they do at their country.

I do surprise when I met 1 guy that we see him sleep at the hotel’s sofa, every single day. We thought that the guy is a worker, but he is not. Actually the guy also Allah guest, travel from far outside Arab’s continent, with a piece of cloth, a piece of ihram and a few dollar pocket money enough for him to eat. He has no proper place to stay and to take a neither bath nor sleeps. I’m totally impressed of his resoluteness. What I want to say is, he knows what he wants. With his effort travel using unknown vehicle and time that he needs to get to Mecca and also things that he will face in between the journey which is we don’t know. I know with Allah granted, what ever you wish you would get it, but I still could not imagine what was this guy been thru. He managed to perform his Umrah after all.

My first 1- reason still apply but now I have to remove my second 2- reason. Today, which is I don’t have to wait 1 January; I want to start to set what I want.

I want:

1. To improve my ibadah especially my solat
2. To save my salary as much as I can in order for me to perform Hajj
3. Re-organize my daily expenses
4. Reduce my laziness attitude
5. To think positively in any matters

I think that’s all la kot.. karang banyak.. tak achieve lak… Wish me luck! Happy new year to all.